This week I have been on retreat in Berkshire. I mentioned it before
here. It was led by Fr de Malleray of the
FSSP and there were fourteen of us altogether. Sadly I had to leave a day early to come back for a wedding in the parish. On the other hand I arrived the night before the retreat started to save a rush on Monday trying to get to Cold Ash, near Newbury from Newcastle for a 2pm start. So I was grateful for Fr de Malleray`s offer of staying a night at the FSSP house in Reading which I was looking forward to seeing anyway.
When I arrived I was invited in for tea. Around the table apart from Father himself (who is French) there was Christopher who has just completed his first year at the FSSP seminary in the USA and is Polish, Fr Grega, a young French Canadian priest who joined the FSSP in January from his diocese and an American FSSP seminarian whose name sadly escapes me. Not only was I the only British person I was the oldest by more than ten years. This was a strange experience as belonging to the diocesan priesthood I`m used to being part of a structure which is top heavy age-wise. I had a tour of the house and was able to see the wonderful conversion job that has been done into making it a religious house complete with a (quite small) chapel. After dinner and clearing up the evening ended with Compline.
Next morning we went to the local parish church of St William of York for Mass. I was interested to see it having seen pictures on the internet. The altar looked splendid with its gradines and `big six` but all this has to be removed a few times each week so that the parish can have the OF Mass there too. The FSSP have still to acquire a church of their own in the UK. Surely that will happen soon given that they have about five native priests (none of whom at present work in the UK) about the same number in formation and four new seminarians starting this year. All this is quite remarkable when you consider that this is for an institute which only has this small house in Reading as a presence in England ( as well as a somewhat larger house in Edinburgh).
The next day we drove to Cold Ash where lunch was arranged for 12 noon for the retreat participants so that we might have a chance to socialise before beginning the silent retreat. Again I was the senior priest by over ten years and as such was invited to say grace. There were about eight of us at lunch eventually and the arrival of Fr Leworthy of the FSSP at last meant I wasn`t the only priest in his 50`s! The rest of the fathers were waiting at Cold Ash pastoral centre when we arrived.
The theme of the retreat was the prayers of the Roman missal so Fr de Malleray took us through the Mass giving a commentary on the spiritual significance of the prayers and rituals of the Extraordinary Form. All I can say was that I had heard nothing like this in my spiritual formation at Ushaw. (John Saward may have taught these things but I onnly had one brief course with him.) Hearing Father speak, the logic of the traditional Mass was made clear and its spiritual purpose revealed. There are lots of phrases from the retreat buzzing round my head as I write. There were things which I might have missed if I had read them in a book such as: the primary purpose of the Mass is the glory of God. I can be quite certain no-one ever told me that at Ushaw. Father drew our attention to this as the word `glory` kept appearing. It applies to the reading of the Gospel whose prime purpose is not instruction but the glory of God (which is why the response of the people or server is `
Gloria tibi Domine`). Father also spoke of how today Catholics feel insulted if the priest says Mass `with his back to the people` as they feel they are excluded somehow but they have failed to realise that they are not the focus of the Mass but God and that the priest`s job is to lead them to God. I can`t give a synopsis of the whole retreat here but this gives a small taste. I also can`t give a synopsis because of the eight talks I only heard five as I had to leave a day early to come back for a wedding in the parish on Friday. There was a Holy Hour with Exposition of the Blessed Sacrament each day and readings at all the meals. I particularly enjoyed those from Archbishop Dolan`s book `
Priests for the third millenium`.
We had four altars in the rather attractive and largely unspoiled 19th century chapel so the first slot for saying Mass was the 5.40am! I`m afraid I don`t operate very well on ess that eight hours sleep so I took at 7.10am slot each morning which meant being asleep by 10pm. It was lovely to walk into the chapel each morning and see all the altars in use.
At times I must admit the retreat was hard going but now I`m back it all seems wonderful and I`d look forward to another. (This is quite like the experience of the Chartres pilgrimage.) It was a long way from the north but I was surprised some of those I know from nearer cities and towns never seem to come to these FSSP events for priests. It would be good to see more priests come next time.
So thank you again Fr de Malleray and thank God for the FSSP.